No relationship is perfect. Eventually, every relationship is bound to experience dishonesty along the road. However, not all dishonesty has to involve cheating. Even little white lies are a form of dishonesty.
Lies break the core essence of honesty in your relationship. When you or your partner hide something from the other or lie about your intentions, your relationship can potentially fall apart. Dealing with dishonesty is not easy, but a couple must accept what has already happened, and come up with solutions to save the relationship.
The following steps can help you deal with dishonesty in a relationship.
Step ## Talk about your concerns
Talk with your partner regarding the dishonesty that took place in your relationship. If it is about new information you have discovered, like a hidden affair or an unpaid debt, ask your partner to explain to you the details thoroughly, and ask why he kept it from you. If you were the one who was dishonest, explain to him why you did it.
Step ## Know the intentions behind the dishonesty
Politely ask your partner about what drove him to act dishonestly, and allow him to tell you what his true reasons are. In return, tell your partner how the dishonesty caused damage in your relationship, and how it made you develop trust issues.
Step ## Explain how dishonesty affects your relationship
Explain to your partner that even the slightest form of dishonesty can ruin the foundation of a healthy relationship. Cite a particular event to support your claim about dishonesty.
For example, tell him about that time he didn't answer his phone and didn't even bother to call you back. Let him know that it made you wonder whether he was with someone else or somewhere he should not be.
Make it clear that trust is fragile and that it should be handled with care. Let your partner be informed about the aftermath of dishonesty in a relationship. Make him realize that lies can drive couples to separate ways.
Step ## Make him promise you honesty
Ask your partner to establish a treaty with you to further avoid dishonesty in your relationship. Be sure to keep your promises to each other, so that if anything comes up in your relationship, both of you aren't be hesitant to come clean.
Step ## Patch things up
Open your doors and give him another chance, if you think it's worth another try. Though it takes a lot of time, commitment, and persistence, it is important that you deal with a current problem so that the both of you can move past it.
Step ## Make time for each other
Always find time for each other. Relationships are molded through time. So, spend quality time with each other every now and then. Get him to do different activities that both of you can enjoy, so that your relationship can grow even stronger while mending the wounds of the past.
Step ## Just keep working on your relationship
Keep on working together to make your relationship a healthy and lasting one. In time, you will begin to build your trust again, or regain it, if it was once lost. Remember that love isn't enough to make a relationship last. It requires hard work too.
Step ## Get some counseling
If you think you cannot solve the relationship on your own, ask for help from a professional relationship counselor or attend a couple's meeting. Relationship counselors will do their best to help you fix your relationship, but of course, will need the efforts from the both of you. This way, your relationship is not easily shaken by challenges of an unpredictable tomorrow.
Sometimes, accepting dishonesty can potentially lead to more dishonesty in the future. This is something you will have to overcome with your partner. Both of you must play your roles and work together to make honesty a strongest foundation of your relationship.
Can you think of other ways to deal with dishonesty in a relationship? Share your thoughts in the comments below!