Speed dating, introduced by Rabbi Yaacov Deyo, is an interesting and efficient way to meet a variety of new people in as little time as possible. Though you can argue that online dating has replaced speed dating, it can still be a lot of fun since you actually meet new potential partners face to face.
But with such little time at your disposal, you literally have to "show them the goods", so to speak, and that means approaching the event with a strategy that will help you find the person you have always wanted to date.
Here are couple of tips and questions to ask when participating in a speed dating event.
What NOT to Do:
Drink
There's a reason why you're not allowed to handle heavy equipment and power tools when you've had a few drinks. It messes with your senses and it can turn an event into an embarrassing mess for you.
Inebriation results in slurred speech and loss of focus, which isn't an ideal mixture if you're attending an extremely time-pressured event where first impressions are more crucial than ever. Overdrinking is also a turn off for a lot of people, so don't throw away your chances. Avoid drinking alcohol before attending, even if you think it might take the edge off.
Attend a speed dating event held in a venue you frequent in
It's already stressful enough to meet new people and make a good impression, but it will be even more so if you're spotted by your friends who also hang out at the same venue. Your best chances are being somewhere where no one knows you.
Fidgeting is a sign of anxiety, so your partner may also become uneasy if he notices you are uncomfortable because some of your friends have spotted you in a speed dating event.
Talk about mundane stuff
You only have #### minutes to talk to every person so boring topics are out of the question. Start off your conversation right away with what interests you and why you think you're interesting to be with.
You're selling yourself without trying to look like you are. Talk about your hobbies and your passions and avoid negative talk or conversations about exes.
Show photos of your kids
If you're comfortable with it, you can disclose to your date that you have children. But it doesn't mean you have to show your date photos of your kids. Too soon. Too soon!
Check your phone while you're on a speed date
Set your phone on silent mode, put it in your pocket, and don't look at it until the speed dating event is over. Looking at your phone in the middle of a date makes you seem uninterested and disrespectful. Focus on your date because that's what the both of you are here for.
What TO Do:
Look nice
Looking your best is extremely crucial in speed dating. Like it or not, your physical appearance will be the first thing your date will notice, so make sure you look and smell good. Speed dating is all about presenting your best qualities in a short amount of time, so make sure to carefully choose what to wear.
Use the right accessories
Wear an appropriate amount of jewelry that expresses your personality. This will help your date gauge whether or not you have similar tastes.
Ask the right questions
Prepare a list of questions to ask. It can be about their hobbies, their type of cuisine, or a story of their last vacation. This will give you an insight on your date's personality.
In Summary
Speed dating is fun if you're well-prepared for it. Don't worry if at the end of the event, you didn't yield potential partners. On the bright side, you got to meet new people who can become potential friends or business contacts in the future.
Have you ever tried speed dating? How did you prepare for it, and how did it go? Share your stories in the comments!
